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Author's Note: This post is an excerpt of the reference guide (click on title): "Seven Keys to Long-Term Relationship Success."
Do you and your partner have compatible financial values?
Numerous studies have identified disagreements over finances as one of the top reasons couples seek marital counseling, as well as one of the top reasons for divorce. While a variety of financial factors can affect nuptial happiness, such as the level of one’s consumer debt and spending habits, one of the most striking statistics is the correlation between frequency of financial disagreements and divorce. According to Jeffrey Dew of the National Marriage Project, “Couples who reported disagreeing about finances once a week were over 30 percent more likely to divorce over time than couples who reported disagreeing about finances a few times per month.”
For more on improving intimacy and compatibility in relationships, download free excerpts of my publications (click on titles): "7 Keys to Long-Term Relationship Success," “Communication Success with Four Personality Types," and "How to Communicate Effectively and Handle Difficult People."
Differences in financial values often appear early in a relationship. For example, who pays for the first date? What about the second date? And the third? Is your partner happy when you give a thoughtful but non-monetary birthday gift, or will he or she feel disappointed because you didn't purchase something? Additional questions to consider:
- Do you and your partner argue over finances regularly?
- Do you often cringe when you see your partner buy items you believe are a waste of money, or vise-versa?
- Is your partner generally happy with what he or she owns, or is there a constant, insatiable desire to always acquire more? What about you?
- Are you and your partner able to solve financial difficulties and differences as a team?
Formulating with your partner a viable financial plan, paying attention to patterns of financial discontent, initiating conversations early to resolve differences, and seeking financial or couples counseling when needed are some of the keys to maintaining financial peace.
“Married couples don’t have to be facing poverty or a job loss for ﬁnancial issues to impact their marriage. Rather, decisions like whether to make a major purchase using consumer credit or how much of a paycheck to put into savings can have substantial consequences for the short-term and long-term health of a marriage. In particular, couples who are wise enough to steer clear of materialism and consumer debt are much more likely to enjoy connubial bliss.”
– Jeffrey Dew
For more on personal and professional success, download free excerpts of my publications: "Communication Success with Four Personality Types," "How to Communicate Effectively and Handle Difficult People," "The 7 Keys to Life Success," "Wealth Building Attitudes, Values, and Habits," "7 Keys to Long-Term Relationship Success," and "Confident Communication for Female Professionals."
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Preston Ni, M.S.B.A. is available as a presenter, workshop facilitator, and private coach. For more information, write to firstname.lastname@example.org, or visit www.nipreston.com.
© 2013 by Preston C. Ni. All rights reserved worldwide.
Dew, Jeffrey. Bank On It: Thrifty Couples are the Happiest.
Stanley, Thomas & Danko, William. The Millionaire Next Door.
Stanley, Thomas & Danko, William. Millionaire Women Next Door.
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Givens, Charles. More Wealth Without Risk.
Givens, Charles. Financial Self Defense.
Clason, George. The Richest Man in Babylon.
Hill, Napoleon. Think and Grow Rich.
Dyer, Wayne. The Power of Intention.
Gardner, Chris. The Pursuit of Happyness.