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My last blog discussed how men have male friendships in four categories (just, trust, must, and rust friends). That discussion focused on trust friends - guys you like and trust but who are not in your closest circle of friends. One responder recently asked how a guy can become closer friends with another guy, in other words, how do guys handle the man date? Read More
See Also
See also the New York Times article by Jennifer 8. Lee, who first coined the term "man date."
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/04/10/fashion/10date.html?pagewanted=all
Straight guys with gay friends
May I also add, straight men can have great friends that are gay men as well. As straight guy friends establish their heterosexuality, the straight man needs to clearly state his heterosexuality and the gay man state his interest in friendship only. Contrary to the stereotype, not all gay guys are physically, emotionally or sexually interested in straight guys.
There are many gay guys who would never be suspected as gay. These guys could have many of the same interests and could turn out being a great friend. Some gay guys I know are all about the outdoors, biking (motorcycles), video games, and sports, and not at all into fashion, drama movies, and interior design.
So, don't limit your friends to straight guys only. Just make sure both guys are clear from the start that there is no interest other than friendship.
man date
I completely agree that straight and gay men can become friends. Jammie Price talks about this in the 1999 book Navigating Differences and I talk about it in Buddy System. Many men who were interviewed attested to having friends whose sexual orientation was different from theirs and a few (both gay and straight men) talked about losing friendships over this issue. As in all relationships, clarity of communication is paramount for people to feel comfortable with each other.
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