Provocative essay, Matthew! I have a comment on one of the possible explanations that you mention, namely, on the issue of "sympathetic activation." The "sympathetic activation" explanation is, perhaps, best understood in relation to the phenomenon of "excitation transfer." The way it works is that the mind interprets the signals that it gets from the body: so if your body is activated, i.e. aroused, the actual context of that arousal or activation paradoxically might be a moot point. The classic example of this goes like this. Say, you have a couple of adults that are of potential romantic interest to each other. You have them spend fifteen minutes on a precariously flimsy rope bridge or on the edge of the cliff or in some other anxiety-and stress-provoking circumstance. In the course of this adrenaline-laden experience their minds may associatively mis-interpret their fear/freight arousal as being suggestive of a romantic connection - after all, from the stand-point of the body the "sympathetic activation" (you know, the heart pounding, sweating, etc.) is the same across such different emotions as fear or anxiety or passion. As a result, there occurs a kind of interpretive mistake - an "excitation transfer," so to say. When these two individuals look back at the moment, they share a physiologically exciting connection - they remember a) being together and b) feeling intensely. While the context fades... Now, if you had the same two people spend fifteen minutes on a bus - sitting next to each other and, perhaps, chatting, they might not be as likely to feel affection towards each other in retrospect... That's probably why "rope courses" make for good cohesion-building (with cohesion being a kind of team "love" of sorts). That's probably why going to see a horror movie on your first date might better your odds of making out at the end of the night. And that's why, perhaps, rape fantasies might be stimulating - as they "transfer" the physiological excitation from fear to the context of the bed-room. Bottomline: shared bodily excitement - whatever the source or context - seems to bond minds. Who knows... I am not an expert on this, per se, but thought that the "excitation transfer" phenomenon might help elaborate your point on "sympathetic activation" and help out the readers... Thanks, Pavel Somov, Ph.D.

I think all explanations seem plausible. I personally subscribe to the desirability explanation. I love the feeling that a man can't control himself around me, of coarse this is only sexy in that I know that he actually can control himself and won't hurt me. A little hair-pulling is nice:)

Yeah, definitely the desirability theory. I suspect that's kind of where a lot of the eroticism from the bodice-ripping novels comes from.

All 4 of them were girls. All of them admitted to having rape fantasies and thought that the desirability explanation was the most likely, for themselves at least. This probably says more about me than anything else but i still found that interesting.

I'm curious about whether or not women who tend to have these fantasies also have other personality traits in common.

And I'm even more curious about whether or not lesbians are as likely to have these fantasies.

Very good essay...
It's worth making the point that women do not fantasise about the violence involved in a real rape. It is more abstracted than real rape.

I would like to see a similar essay about "Why do men fantasise about rape?" with similar stats and research behind it.

Sadly, I wonder if it will ever get written by anyone... does our culture think it is normal for men to fantasise about rape but abnormal for women?

I think that you did miss one. The power aspect... and namely the most considered reason for actual rape. It is linked to the pain aspect, of masochisim, but may not involve physical pain. Also, it is similar in "biological surrender" but erotic fantasy is an active choice, and biological predisposition suggests that there is none.

It is in my experience that feminism of recent years, has expandeded some fantasies while limiting others. (mostly in the contrary dominance -- aka it is ok to ask and demand, dress sexy, take control, but it became less ok for a woman to submit in this day and age of liberation) Its the "Mona Lisa Smile" problem -- Some people want what they want - current trends be damned - and those trends can pass a ton of righteous judgment (and the requisite shame).

I mean, that dichotomy personally messed my head up quite a bit, as it created a synergy between dominance and open sensuality... and it was complicated to acquire the openness without plucking the chords of dominant sex-roles - even if it went contrary to personal desires.

I want to be completely honest with this, I am a girl who finds it hard to become interested in anything else but forced sex and it dominates my sex life. Never would I want to be raped for real but I am so desperate to learn why I have this fantasy.

You say >>"Desirabilty - Many women like to believe that they're so attractive that men cannot resist the urge to overtake them. "<<

This is the easiest answer for me, I have a low self esteem and consider myself unattractive and so do a lot of other women out there.

Since I was a young teen I could not imagine someone 'making love' to me because they wanted me I imagined that they would treat me bad not care about me and just satisfy themselves. since then I have found I haven't wanted my partner to do anything sexually for me.

Also the sad and lonely victim is an attraction. Being locked away or kidnapped.. no responsibilities no stress .. like being someones pet no one has any expectations of you. Someone visits you pets you and treasures you. When I play acted as a child I'd want to be the goodie scared and helpless captured by the baddy.

Then your back to Desirability because the princesses in childrens films, stories and in fairy tales are never treated nicely. They are so beautiful that the mean man wants to lock them away like a bird in a cage to sing or dance for him forever and wouldn't anyone want to be desired that badly?

God I could go on forever its so weird and I am so troubled by it too. I hope this helps you in your studies

...interesting essay, and I enjoyed reading everyone's comments. but at the end of it all, if it's actually a fantasy, then it is not rape. Using the term rape in this context is misleading. I'm sure we can all agree there is a difference between rape, and acting out a fantasy, but using the same term makes rape seem enticing when in reality it is not. If you want someone to rape you, it's not really rape. I think we need to be careful in what words we use.

I was dissapointed to see that among your points of possible "explanation" for rape fantasies you did not include the prevalent sexualization of violence in our culture. . . watch any contemporary horror flick. I believe this is covered in Jackson Katz' video "Tough Guise". . .?

I would like to be honest. I do have a lot of Rape fantasy which I'm the victim. Even though I enjoy fantasying being the submissive one but in real life my personality is quite opposite. I'm mostly have a strong personality that shows people that they can't mess with me with out consequences, which makes most people of the opposite sex feels intimated, even though I'm just a girl of 5'2 and 113 pounds which is a pretty small stature. Mostly even though I have these fantasies I don't want to actually be a victim. I prefer to mostly have someone that desire me so much that they would force themselves on me but only if they are a desirable partner also. I don't know I guess it's not consider rape if you want it also but since I'm mostly a reserved person who never want to make the first move having the partner force himself on me is more like the idea.

I absolutely don't buy the evolutionary psych approach, though I do imagine there are biological elements that will cause some women to have rape fantasies at all times and places.

Another important element to note is the addition of BDSM. While BDSM and rape fantasy communities do have some differences and antagonisms, there is also plenty of crossover. Adding in women with bondage fantasies to the numbers makes the proportion even more representative of women in general.

And yet another is that many women who wouldn't automatically fantasize about rape might find it hot in an individual context or small selection of contexts. That might explain romance novels, and certainly helps explain under-reporting. Maybe they'd only ever do it with their boyfriend... but they'd do it.

I have to say that the male rape culture argument makes some sense. Remember that changing gender roles doesn't necessarily mean liberation. In fact, if men are socialized to be increasingly docile (vis-a-vis their excess before) and submissive to women (again, switching to a healthy balance), then a backlash might occur which might come out in rape fantasies. Similarly, many liberated women I've encountered express plenty of misogynistic ideas in their fantasies. Sex is all about what's repressed.

Perhaps these fantasies are latent desires to actually be raped. For the most part, nice guys finish last. That is why women stay with abusive partners or cheat on the "nice" guy with men that treat them like garbage. Women want the excitement and unpredictability that abusers and rapists give them. I remember many years ago a woman on television justifying staying with an abuser by saying something along the lines of "you don't want a puppy (aka nice guy) that follows you around, you want excitement." It seems, then, that most women do want to be slapped around, beaten, humiliated, degraded, etc. The problem is that sometimes these women think this is what they want; then when it happens they find out it's not for them, and some then turn around and blame the man, even getting him into trouble with the law.

Have any studies been conducted on women that are raped and later consent to have sex with that rapist? I have always had this curiosity as to why a woman would months later have consensual sex with a man that once raped her. I have not had any luck finding any psychological studies explaining why this may occur.

What about the women who fantasise about raping men? Or men who fantasise about being raped? All of the articles I've ever read on the subject of rape fantasies come from a simplistic perspective wherein women only fantasise about being raped, never about being the rapist.

I was sorta surprised not to see any mention of previous work on this subject, most notably Helen Hazen's book "Rape, Romance, and the Female Imagination" from about 25 years ago.

It would be interesting to write an essay on how the Feminist Studies fantasy of a "male rape culture" is itself a manifestation of some of the explanations presented. :>
(The fact is, there is no "male dominated" culture on the planet where rape is not both illegal and heavily punished.)

Finally, with regard to "Sympathetic Activation", I was somewhat surprised to see no explicit mention that women produce most/all of what testosterone they have in their adrenaline glands, which explains the stimulative effects of things like amusement park rides and horror flicks (which always involve a young/attractive female at risk). In short, danger juices the female libido in a big way. This is probably a large factor, given what extremely safe lives the average person lives these days.

I know a few women who dont admit but wont deny that they have a rape fantasy, so i know it to be a fact that some women do, but i think that sometimes its better to leave it as a fantasy, i acted out a fantasy with a partner a few years ago and although it was good at the time i find my self completely un-entertained by it now, although it has expanded my form of sexuality massively. So i wonder if this is the case with most fantasys and maybe this one.

If a woman acted out a rape fatasy, would they be as interested in doing again afterwards or would they then want to refine it or even then swap it round?

He teaches men how to legally rape women with their minds:

http://www.dimitrithelover.com/toronto_real_men_october_2009.html

Personally, I think a lot of it is societal conditioning. Someone mentioned horror movies. Violence and weak women are sexualized--from porn to monster movies. Little boys get toy guns and soldiers while girls get curvaceous Barbies. It all seems very strange to me.

I am a queer woman and I do not have rape fantasies. In fact, none of the queer women I know do, though many of my straight friends have such fantasies. I am curious about the statistics of queer people and rape fantasies.

I don't understand how evolution or biology would have much to do with it. If that was the case, wouldn't more women regardless of sexual orientation have these fantasies? And how would it explain women (like me) who have the opposite fantasy--of strong women or domination of men?

Why is all this attention being paid to women's rape fantasies? It's not as taboo as men who want to be raped or even strong warrior women.