Before You Get Engaged

Questions to contemplate if you're thinking of marriage.

by Michael Batshaw, LCSW

God and Money before marriage!

Religion is not unimportant and love will not conquer all. Many couples feel that their love and connection to one another will surmount all foreseeable obstacles. These individuals should be applauded for their passion, and in many cases a loving and strongly connected couple is able to weather most challenges and come away stronger, wiser and closer. Read More

Which truth is "the truth" in my relationship?

What is the truth about my partner? Finding an answer to this question is a bit complicated. The reason for this is that our moods shift frequently, our lives are constantly changing, and so are our feelings about our significant other...... Read More

Beware of the person of your dreams!

I am sure that the parents of Sandra Bullock and Elin Nordegren (Tiger's wife) are wishing that their children had made very different choices when they decided they had found their "dream" partner. So, before you get the ring and plan for happily ever after, please consider the following... Read More

Is your relationship like a Hollywood Romance? Beware!

Hollywood gets it wrong. Read More

A Zen Koan for Post-Valentine's Day: Do you have "healthy doubt" or "unhealthy doubt" about whether your partner is "The One"

Do I have “healthy doubt” or “unhealthy doubt” about my partner’s suitability for me?

Doubt, uncertainty and the feeling of not knowing for sure is not a problem! In fact, contrary to what we might at first think, experiencing such feelings can be the greatest path toward intuitive certainty. To this end, my Zen Master would often say, “don’t know”, is closest to “enlightenment”, or intuitive understanding. What did he mean by this and how might such understanding help us attain greater clarity in our relationships...

How do I know if I have met the perfect partner?

Do you have an idea of what your perfect partner will be like?

This was the image that I was carrying of the perfect mate: She was going to be wearing a flannel shirt and jeans. She’d meet me in a café or bookstore and comment on the book I would be reading-- something obscure and interesting. She’d say how she had read it too and loved it. We would then engage in like-minded conversation on life, philosophy, and shared hobbies. Our chemistry would be easy and wonderful and like a flash of lightning we would both realize we had met the person we would spend the rest of our life with.