Two very different people, describing entirely different situations but describing the very same feeling- fear. Balcom's fear was pretty warranted; he trips, he dies. Disco's fear, however, was illogical. Worst case scenario: he trips over his words and the girl rolls her eyes and moves on. Trust me, he'll get over it. There are lots of single women in New York City. Still, his knowledge of that fact didn't help him one bit overcoming his fear. What's going on here?

Fear is is a deeply hardwired human emotion. I could cite loads of evolutionary psychologists, but I'd rather quote 50 Cent and Robert Greene in their book The 50th Law (the 50th law is fear nothing), since they put it so well:

 

 

 

 

 

In the beginning, fear was a basic, simple emotion for the human animal. We confronted something overwhelming -- the imminent threat of death in form of wars, plagues and natural disasters -- and we felt fear...Fear is the oldest and strongest emotion known to man, something deeply inscribed in our nervous system and subconscious...

Over time, however, something strange began to happen. The actual terrors that we faced began to lessen in intensity as we gained increasing control over our environment. But instead of our fears lessening as well, they began to multiply in number. We started to worry about our status in society -- whether people liked us, or how we fit into the group. We became anxious for our livelihoods, the future of our families and children, our personal heatlh, and the aging process. Instead of a simple, intense fear of something powerful and real, we developed a kind of generalized anxiety. It was as if the thousand of years of feeling fear in the face of nature could not go away- we had to find something at which to direct our anxiety, no matter how small or improbable.

On a recent plane ride, I watched a Channel 4 documentary called Daredevils, The Sky Walker about Dean Potter, a famous slackliner. A slackline is typically made of nylon. While it's a form of tight rope walking, it's very different than tight rope walking; instead of a steady and taught rope or wire, a slackline is very unsteady and dynamic, constantly interacting with your body and your current state of balance. Also, unlike tight rope walking, slackliners rarely use physical support like a balance bar. Highlining is extreme slacklining: slacklining long distances high above the ground. Dean Potter is a true trendsetter highliner.

Here's a picture of Potter walking a 100 foot long, 1-inch thick slackline at Taft Point in Yosemite Valley, about 1000 feet off the ground with NO SUPPORT. He falls, he dies. No question. Holy shit. (My heart sinks just looking at this picture.)

I was so in awe of his accomplishments that when I got home I digged deeper on these highliners. I realized there is much we can learn about life from these brave souls. In fact, I came to realize that life really is just one long slackline. I see no difference, except for the consequences of failing: in highlining if we fall, we die- but for most situations in our daily lives, if we fail, we only get stronger. This is a hopeful message: it means we can apply many of the lessons learned by highliners down here on the ground, without worrying about the same potentially dire consequences. 

Here are 12 of those lessons.

1. Fear Can Be An Obstacle Or A Driving Force To Succeed: The Choice Is Yours

What drives highliners? It appears to be their desire to control their fears, the adrenaline rush of doing so, and the immense sense of satisfaction and accomplishment they feel when they get to the other side (the concrete measure that they overcame their fears).

The fundamental human drive to control fear can be just as strong as fear itself. For these brave highliners, their drive to overcome fear trumps their fear of action.

In Dean Potter's words:

"When I go out there untethered, the feelings that I slip I die totally overwhelms me. I am after the feeling of total control. I'm after that in all of life, and for now that's how I find it."

In Balcom's words:

"It is an incredible feeling getting to the other side. And stepping on the rock on the other side. It's a wonderful feeling of victory. The greatest feeling in the world."

According to 50 Cent and Robert Greene:

Fear creates its own self-fulfilling dynamic- as people give in to it, they lose energy and momentum. Their lack of confidence translates into inaction that lowers confidence levels further, on and on. If you view everything through the lens of fear, then you tend to stay in retreat mode. You can just as easily see a crisis or problem as a challenge, an opportunity to prove your mettle, the chance to strengthen and toughen yourself, or a call to collective action. By seeing it as a challenge, you will have converted this negative into a positive purely by a mental process that will result in positive action as well." 

Fear can be a strong inhibitor or driving force for greatness; it is up to you to decide how fear is going to affect you.

2. Great Disability, Loneliness, and Isolation Can Be A Great Driving Force For Greatness

"I've always been somewhat of a loner. I seem to take more alone time that the average person." - Dean Potter

In addition to his feelings of isolation and loneliness, Potter experienced a great social disability growing up: