Art of Charisma

Teaching men and women how to meet and connect.

Wayne Elise, a dating coach, conversation expert, and founder of Charisma Arts, teaches men and women how to approach each other and create genuine connections. See full bio

September 17, 2009

Finding Inspiration in an Unexpected Place

The dead have one single message for you. I hear them say it to me every time I run through a cemetery. They whisper, “See you soon.” Read More

February 9, 2009

How to Get a Callback from an Attractive New Friend

Stop! Don't record that voicemail until you read this.
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May 23, 2008

Seize the moment with inarticulation!

Here's a picture. Kelly is just leaving her brownstone when she spots Mr. Right walking by, carrying his groceries back to the firehouse. She has previously noticed him in the neighborhood, his tattooed biceps and propensity to be an easy target for cookie-hustling girl scouts. She wants to meet this guy. And now is her perfect moment. He's walking her way. What should Kelly say? Read More

April 11, 2008

How to Deal with Approach Anxiety

Approach Anxiety: noun, singular. The fear of approaching and interacting with a stranger you find attractive.

If you suffer from clinical approach anxiety, go see a therapist who can prescribe the appropriate drugs, or take you back to 1984. I can't help. I'm more of a mechanic of human interaction. Thankfully I'm the type of grease monkey most people need. That's because most people suffer from non-clinical approach anxiety—a common sort of thing that frustrates us, and prevents us from approaching a stranger we want to get to know. Most of us can function normally day to day, but when we see someone attractive across a crowded room... ZONK! We become locked into a catatonic state I call FGB, Frozen Guy Behavior or Frozen Girl Behavior. Read More

March 21, 2008

The Tragedy of Missed Opportunity

There is a great tragedy in this world, and that is people who are legitimately attracted to each other not hooking up. I see it every day in bookstores, coffee shops and even supermarkets. Long looks over frozen bacon. He's a hottie, single-dad who enjoys walks in the park and Baskin Robbins. She's a hottie, single, karaoke singer who enjoys walks on the beach and Jamba Juice. It's not so much of a stretch to see they would be perfect for each other. But wham, bang, boom - nothing. They wheel their carts past each other as if it was commonplace to pass up your soulmate in the frozen food section. Read More

Relationships Basics

Love is the most profound emotion known to human beings. For most people, romantic relationships are the most meaningful element in their lives. But the ability to have a healthy, loving relationship is not innate. Almost all of us have experienced a failed relationship, and most of us have to work consciously to master the skills necessary to make them flourish.

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