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Anger in the Age of Entitlement

Cleaning up emotional pollution

Self-Help
How Do We Hear the Bird of Hope?

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on September 1, 2023

The great task of life is to give our experience the most benign interpretations plausible. Control the meaning of your life, and you’ll hear the bird of hope sing.

The great task of life is to give our experience the most benign interpretations plausible. Control the meaning of your life, and you’ll hear the bird of hope sing.

Relationships
Love and Emotional Power

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on August 29, 2023

Emotions have a natural thermostat that regulates their comfort level by lowering or raising intensity. Failure to own them forfeits the power of the thermostat.

Emotions have a natural thermostat that regulates their comfort level by lowering or raising intensity. Failure to own them forfeits the power of the thermostat.

Relationships
Do You Want to Feel Self-Righteous or Love?

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on August 25, 2023

In a relationship, we can be hypersensitive to the effect of what we perceive our partners say and do, but insensitive to the effect of what we say and do.

In a relationship, we can be hypersensitive to the effect of what we perceive our partners say and do, but insensitive to the effect of what we say and do.

Relationships
Love in the Age of Entitlement

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on August 22, 2023

You’re entitled to respect when respectful, compassion when compassionate, help when helpful, fairness when fair, and justice when just.

You’re entitled to respect when respectful, compassion when compassionate, help when helpful, fairness when fair, and justice when just.

Relationships
Attitudes of Connection

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on August 15, 2023

Small gestures of connection—eye contact, a smile, a gentle touch—built into your daily routine, do wonders to create a stable attitude of connection.

Small gestures of connection—eye contact, a smile, a gentle touch—built into your daily routine, do wonders to create a stable attitude of connection.

Gratitude
Why Aren’t We More Appreciative?

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on August 11, 2023

Appreciation is opening your heart to allow yourself to be enhanced by certain qualities of people or by the beauty of nature or art.

Appreciation is opening your heart to allow yourself to be enhanced by certain qualities of people or by the beauty of nature or art.

Relationships
The Miracle of Love

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on August 4, 2023

The only way to discover the self fully is to love someone. Love is the most vivid and compelling mirror of the inner self.

The only way to discover the self fully is to love someone. Love is the most vivid and compelling mirror of the inner self.

Self-Help
How to Break the Self-Defeating Habit of Negative Labels

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on July 25, 2023

Negative labels and characterizations are substitutes for thought and analysis. They’re often emotional signals of membership in a tribe, in stark opposition to other tribes.

Negative labels and characterizations are substitutes for thought and analysis. They’re often emotional signals of membership in a tribe, in stark opposition to other tribes.

Relationships
How to Make It Easier for Your Partner to Validate You

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on July 21, 2023

Genuine accountability in relationships follows compassion—your partner must care that you’re hurt or feel bad and want to help you feel better, not merely admit to hurting you.

Genuine accountability in relationships follows compassion—your partner must care that you’re hurt or feel bad and want to help you feel better, not merely admit to hurting you.

Identity
Identity Resilience

Steven Stosny, Ph.D. on June 23, 2023

The same culture wars that have devolved public discourse into chronic name-calling and pejorative adjectives can also destabilize an individual's identity.

The same culture wars that have devolved public discourse into chronic name-calling and pejorative adjectives can also destabilize an individual's identity.