I just finish reading a tree grows in Brooklyn. The book was written in 1943 and set in the first and second decades of the 20th century. One passage in the book makes my ears twitch. I'm paraphrasing, but the setting is a bar scene in which a patron states " If women were given the right to vote ( while shuddering at the thought) and his wife didn't vote his way, he'd break her neck ".

The book was published in 1943 , not that long ago. Can women be good mothers, spouses and leaders. My answer is yes, with proper support.

The reason a man appears to do this with some ease is because there is generally a person talking care of home. In my opinion, 9/10 times it's a woman.

The family structure, work structure needs to evolve with changes within our society. Palin is being attacked because she's in the spotlight. A part of me does wonder where is her husband/ childrens father and why isn't he publicly sharing the burden of " shame".

Women are judged harshly and unfairly in leadership roles and must maintain a certain image. We can't be nut crackers, get sick , feel tired, need to find a baby sitter ,cry, have an off day, take a proper maternity leave ( Palin) etc. If she decided to take three months off that would be a reason to call her not capable. She's damned if she does and damned if she doesn't.

Our society to some degree is still sexist. As women we're held to a higher standard which leaves room for things to fall through the cracks.

Counterquestion: Why do women/men have to be good spouses, mothers/fathers and leaders?

Women and men both struggle with balance but women have a bit more pressure to uphold the parental end of things in addition to any career goals and marital nurturing. Perhaps having felt such pressure is what leads women to passionately defend thier stance, unfortunately resulting in the bad-mouthing of other women and thier choices. I think the most liberating thing we can do as women, is look for the best in others and appreciate the compassion behind any woman's difficult choice. I don't think any person sets out to be a bad mom, bad employee, or bad spouse and the ratio of effort in each area can't always be linked directly to outcomes anyway. For example, in some cases, kids may benefit from having a stay at home mom. In other cases, they may benefit more from a working mom who models goal aquisition outside of the home. It's nearly impossible to measure what route would have been best when the die is already cast. Our focus should be less on deciding what choices are best and more on assuring there are ample choices to begin with.

If I wonder if the age of the children is an important variable in this? Isn't it pretty well demonstrated that infants and very young children benefit in myriad ways from time in the presence of -- if not in direct physical contact with -- their mother? Doesn't this run deeper than politics or philosophy, on a biological level?

It's not about "women in power" so much as women (or men) who preach the importance of family yet find oh-so-many reasons to spend most of their time doing something else.

If all her kids were in double digits, I wouldn't give it another thought.

Hmm, I wonder if people's feelings would change if Sarah Palin's husband came forward publicly and said that he would be taking over care of the family, so his wife could focus on her job?
I also wonder if people would be concerned if a man who was the sole caretaker of five kids wanted to run for office?

It's a bit much for a person to both be vice-president and be the primary caretaker of a large family, regardless of sex. As the primary caretaker is usually the mother, most people are going to assume that a father won't be asked to take up both roles.

My point is that the sexism Palin faces may not totally be because people think she cannot juggle as many roles as a man. Some of it may be because people are unconsciously assuming that she's the primary caregiver, and so will have juggle more roles then the (traditionally male) secondary caregiver.
The fact that she is a Republican would add to this confusion, since it is associated with 'traditional' and 'family' values; it's hard to buck stereotype when your rhetoric reinforces it.

Where I actually get concerned is when she refers to herself as a 'hockey mom'. Perhaps she's just using the phrase to say that she is aggressive and cheerful, but the 'hockey mom' stereotype also implies spending a great deal of maternal attention on one's children. It makes me wonder if *she* thinks she adopt the traditional 'hockey mom' role and be vice-president.

Doing both is not beyond question, but does mean that she is going to have to juggle more conflicting loyalties, and so perhaps is a valid question, not just sexism.

If she's not intending to adopt both roles, she really should be clear about it.

(Though being vague is actually a good strategy. The traditional mom role is appealing to the Republican Base. It also invites criticism, which lets her call her critics sexist ... I doubt that she's quite that calculating, but she *is* running for the party that created the Swift Boat attacks in 2004.)

Do you believe Senators Biden, Clinton, McCain, and Obama, have been great senators based on facts? Obama - yes! Byden - possible. McCain -no way. The best decision he has made was to marry money and stay with it.

Do you believe Governor Palin has been a great governor based on facts? NO. she has left her hometown with debt.

Do you think men can be great spouses, fathers, and leaders? If they are qualified and experienced.

Do you think women can be great spouses, mothers, and leaders? Yes, if they are qualified and experienced.

I believe that the problem is in the fact that while Palin wants to enter politics like other men do, she does not want to be treated like them. And she does not handle the questions as well as Hillary did. If you enter politics, you should be expected to be asked and be able to answer provocative questions, whether you are a male or a female.

"This central point is what inspired me to write Alpha Female Leader...In Palin's case, she seems to have put the effort behind her actions and there also seems to be a backlash, even as she went back to work days after delivering her last child instead of taking months off"

If Sarah Palin is the best example you could come up with of what you consider an Alpha Female (and it seems to be since that is all you've written about), I definitely won't be purchasing your book anytime soon.