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Newt Gingrich -- instead of being attacked for his marital meanderings -- should be hailed for being the forward-looking sexual avatar and visionary that he is. Read More
I get that there's an element
I get that there's an element of sarcasm here, but, come on. There is a big difference between polyamory and lying to your partner about your non-monogamy. There is also a difference between having a real conversation about opening an otherwise healthy marriage and telling your wife you've become bored with her and asking her to condone an affair you're already having, while she's in a state of extreme stress.
Gingrich runs on a platform of "traditional family values," has made it pretty clear with his words what that means to him, and deserves some scrutiny. It's also fair to assume that anyone he married would have the same idea of what "traditional" marriage means, and he should have anticipated some resistance on her part and been sensitive to the subject.
Do not make the mistake of equating this man's actions with those of polyamorous people who actually care about the lives & feelings of the people involved.
You know, seriously,
I thought about what it would have taken Gingrich to convince Marianne -- who seems like an intelligent, caring woman who loved the man -- to participate fully in this triad. And, for starters, as you point out, it wouldn't have involved the sneakiness that is part and parcel of Gingrich's character.
It is distressing that someone like Gingrich may be rising as the most likely candidate for the Republican nomination for president. For what is most evident about Gingrich is that his entire focus is in turning every feeling, every utterance, to his self-serving advantage. What is most telling about the end of his marriage is not that he was screwing another woman, but that he dumped his wife (as he did his former wife) when she became ill.
When you call Gingrich a pig, it's not because of his sexual exploits. It's because he has no regard for any human being outside of himself.
I was also wondering, what
I was also wondering, what would his response have been had she found the idea favorable? Would he have been comfortable in an open marriage, one in which his wife was also able to take other lovers? How would this have affected his political views, his political career?
Just the facts, Ma'am
Let us for a moment shift the onus for this discussion to the opposite gender. What woman would marry a man who lay abed with you and calls on the telephone to give a kiss-off to their present spouse? Hardly seems safer than a post coital cigarette. What has been sadly missing in this primary sideshow has been unvarnished truth. May this just be a "Hell hath no fury, like a woman scorned"?
Newt seems to be a fairly versed historian. He should know that setting new sexual standards has been reserved for those approaching deification (i.e. Henry VIII). Even Mr. Gingrich knows he isn't there.....Yet.
Speaking as a woman, Newt
Speaking as a woman, Newt behaviour towards his 2 wives is not really shocking. As ambitious guys / Alpha Males go, he is pretty conventional, checking out replacements when the devote-wife had to take a break from the role ( illness). Probably sold the old line - my wife does not understand me, you makes me feels like the special man you know I can be, blah, blah,blah”. He is not breaking new sexual ground. More of the same.
Some people are descent, some are not. But people have patterns, his seems to a be that one of an ass. There is a market for them, some women see the human buried deep down but marry the selfish and manipulative bully, it’s gender programming.
And Callie, to add insult to injury, might be the one who devotedly buys the blue pills, even if you can’t know what people like to do in bed by their looks.
In the bar I worked (in the financial district), on Valentine’s day, we used to get a different clientele because husbands took their official other-half somewhere else. The next day it was business as usual.
I think Newt is pretty special kind of Suidae, because trying to impeach your president over his affair when you are having yourself takes some kind of cojones and a suicidal lack of shame.
approaching deification (i.e. Henry VIII) - what?
Henry VIII is approaching deification? You mean the real one or the mean and moody 6 pack-abs who never ages in the Tudor series? Because being his wife or his subject was real dangerous business.
Correct doremi
You can find hundreds of Newt-like wanna be alphas at married and dating websites such as Ashley Madison. Not one of those men have a decent wife among them. Laughable.
One might want to draw parallels between Newt and Clinton, but I don't think Bill is as heartless.
Anonymous Bonobo Chimp
Don’t think I was as harsh as you.
I did not say “ my wife is not decent “ just “she does not understand me” - said directly or implied - meaning “ you do and that is why I want to be with you”. They mean it at the time.
When I was younger that would work, now I ask - what, she speaks a foreign language? Is she she an idiot? Are you showing her the real you and if not, why not? Are you afraid, don’t know how or don’t want to have your dearest know all about you? If so why? Separate the ones who don’t want to, can’t and my favorite, the guy with the Whore / Madonna complex, who believes that his Mrs is his mother and needs to be protected from his dirty and ugly side.
I think that for some men, an affair is therapy, a way to make themselves feel better, to get something they are not getting from the primary relationship, but it’s also distancing operation.
Men speak differently about feelings than women, you have got to listen and not expect him to be like one of your girlfriend. Sometimes, as women, we speak too much when we should keep quiet and don’t say enough - in clear and simple terms- when we should. When your man says - what is wrong? “Nothing” is not the right answer, even when he is dumb, he is smart enough to know it’s not nothing.
With Ashley Madison, it’s a 5-7 site, so you know that the contract is an affair. How you will handle might not go down like the plan. Your feelings might get in the way, as well as sexual jealousy and the emotional lying and cheating might take an emotional toll. Worse you might find that it’s too much for your conscience, not everybody has an ability to compartmentalize.
Dating on the net as made it way too easy for dogs to be - playing with someone’s feelings and longing - , you have got to discriminate and make an inventory of all your weaknesses, that should be a good firewall as any.
The best seducers are the ones that make it about love and not about sex.
They are not always the prettiest. I am sure it would have been easier to be seduce by Bill, as a mamma’s boy, he knows what buttons to push. Still makes him a dog though.
As for Newt, when I see him, I think of bad breath ( the bull he comes out with) , moth-balls skin ( he can’t be outside and smell the roses very much) and being made to feel inferior and inadequate - not good buttons.
aa
some people claim the aa or other 12-step groups are a "P**"-SS but a post-post scriptum is a P.P.S.
Disclaimer: I cant handle my NATIVE language very well. My english often turns into crazy-ish or worse.
Newt & Callista: War with the Newts
Title: THE WAR WITH THE NEWTS
Link: http://deyanbrashich.com/home/2012/1/26/the-war-with-the-newts.html
Excerpt: “And in the name of True Newtdom. In the name of Glory and Greatness. [Our] slogan is, it’s us or them." The War with the Newts
Title: THE WAR WITH THE
Title: THE WAR WITH THE NEWTS
Link: http://deyanbrashich.com/home/2012/1/26/the-war-with-the-newts.html
Excerpt: “And in the name of True Newtdom. In the name of Glory and Greatness. [Our] slogan is, it’s us or them." The War with the Newts
Perhaps this is what turned Santorum so anti-sex?
Much as I love to joke about Newt and his mysterious sexual gravitational pull on women who aren't me, or anyone I've ever met, I had to shudder a bit reading the details. Well, I shudder a bit whenever I read the details on Newt's sexual activities. Godlike as he is. My, my.
Ahh, I get the moon business now. Gravitation notwithstanding, Newt mustn't merely suck everyone/thing in, he must conquer and get to rename. Good work if you can get it, eh?
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