I agree that whatever money is collected should go to the children. But I would like to add that, ironically enough, if the mother applies for welfare the government will back her to sue the father for it's financial gain. On the flipside, what about the father who makes in excess of $100,000+ but pays minimal to the mother, yet the state does nothing to back the mother for it gains nothing from it. Having money, unfortunately does make a difference in who has the upper hand, hence; the father with money and our government with power.

Dear Mr. Raeburn:

Thank you for publishing this insightful article. The facts you presented and the circumstances revealed that the mission of Planned Parenthood of America is a valid one and needs the support of Americans. Gone are the days of the old AFDC program, which really was a trap for single-parent women. TANF is now helping women feel better about themselves, builds their self-esteem through supported and mandatory job training to transition into the workforce. The welfare-to-work philosophy has worked wonders for the psyche of American single parent women. Other studies have shown that women would rather work, earn a paycheck, while the kids are at school, than be a perceived by society as a "freeloader on taxpayers." However, teenage and adult males need to be the targets of media for social re-engineering; their attitudes towards women and children need to be reformed and they need to be retrained to be responsible. Self-responsibility needs to be reinforced. These men you wrote about should have been thinking about how they would support a child rather than in the heat of passion -- thinking only of their immediate, sexual satisfaction. Thanks for bringing this up.

I couldn't agree with the above commenter more. As a society, handling our responsibilities should be our primary resonsibility. From paying our own debt to taking care of our own children, Americans seem to have interpreted the American Dream as the ultimate freebie pass. Here we can buy a car with no money down, get cable and not pay for three months, father children and not feed, clothe, shelter, or--as my mom loves to say--"even give them a piece of bubblegum." It's ludicrous that this land of plenty is still struggling with a problem like failure to pay child support. I refuse to believe that these fathers, in a country where men are still often paid more than their female counterparts, cannot afford to financially assist in supporting their progeny. Consider, as Rebecca pointed out, these mothers benefit from welfare programs that help them find work and motivate them to take the reigns of responsibility into their own hands. If we focused on reforming fatherhood so that it became, not an ATM business, but a business of parenting, perhaps the national debt of deadbeat dads could shrink. More importantly, I want these child support injured fathers to consider the cost of total care for one child for one year, then ask themselves how much is enough. Is there any such thing as too much when you have a child? And why do relationships, emotions, or any other detail have anything to do with taking care of your offspring?

Paul Raeburn

To anonymous: I share your outrage over the wealthy father who pays a minimal amount to the mother. The point here, however, was that two-thirds of the non-custodial parents who owe the money make $10,000 or less per year.

Rebecca: I agree that welfare-to-work has virtues, but could we not continue that program and also allow child support to go to the children, not to the government?

Shamrock: If we make fathers criminals, or force them to pay the government, we're not nurturing fatherhood. There are no easy answers, of course, but perhaps jail should be reserved for the bad guys, not for the poor fathers who are unable to pay--even if it was their irresponsible behavior that led to the problem. Could you survive if the government took 65% of your salary? I couldn't.

How can child support be monitored so that fathers pay it know that it is going directly to the childs needs and not to the mothers personal gains.

A.

What can be done to remedy the situation, who do I contact to get the unfair laws changed. What can we do?

Of these so called deadbeat dads.how many are fathers to Babies caring for babies.......?

Interesting that many (way too many) are teenage boys. Now how does a teenage boy not out of high school get a job that pays minimum wage, pay support and have enough over to live? The answer is one of two.Either the grandparents start to shoulder the cost of this baby (which I'm sure most would rather not) or we send this deabeat to jail. What ever happened to responsibility and accountability? Women have 4 options when it comes to babies. Men have none except abstinence. Men are held accountable, women are not. Yes both have the responsibility when the child is born but only one has the accountability before the child is born.
Take a look at teenage pregnancy rates.
Whats the solution? Can someone tell me what right a 14 or 15 year old girl has to have a baby she cannot afford or to pass the cost of such to someone else? Indeed what right does anyone have to have a baby they cannot afford? Take a look at all the other overpopulated parts of the world and see what that lack of accountability leads to. POVERTY SICKNESS DISEASE OPPRESSION. I think that society needs to apply a means test so that wee can stop this spiral of welfare dependence.

Isn't it funny how they talk about fathers being responsible for their kids and the first thing they do is take away their kids?

Isn't is funny how they want fathers to look after their kids but what they mean is they want their paychecks?

Isn't it funny how planned parenthood is keen on the idea that every woman has the right to abort her child, but not about the right of an expectant father to give up his child?

The bigots are all around us all the time.
- - -
Ex-fathers
Restitution for separated fathers and children.

What happens when these children emancipate? How does the custodial parent survive without someone paying their way through life? Those dependent on welfare AND child support to survive are irresponsible and unaccountable for their own lives anyway never mind the children they too are supposed to support. It shouldn't be just the state and the noncustodial parent who has to take care of such people as this.

All this money does is make people dependent on the system, obviously they are losers in life anyway so why reward them with more money? There has to be a better way to where custodial parents are also held accountable and not just lay all the responsibility on the non custodial parent alone.

I don't understand the system at all. Mine was set at $300 a month period and I have never applied for welfare benefits after my divorce. I work hard for everything and the child support goes where it should to my child. I guess I am the odd duck when it comes to this but I guess I am also confused. My fiance's ex wife is taking him to court again for child support and I don't understand does child support effect welfare benefits? Is it considered income and therefore if they are on welfare do they then stop working if they meet the minimum guidelines in income including what they receive in child support? If so then it is quite obvious what her actual ambition behind reviewing the administrative order is. Child support should stop and obtain arrearages through tax returns instead of taking all that a non custodial parent makes and leaving them nothing to live on. And the drivers liscense thing is just ridiculous! How are they supposed to get to work?!

This system is disgusting. The current child support system is unacceptable.

The law's need to be changed as far the current system of child support debtors prisons and the power and control these people have over your lives. It is too one sided and unfair to the non custodial parent and ultimately to the children involved as well.

IV-D funding needs to be cut off from these states or at least minimized, they are using this money to hurt poor parents and children.

I found out today they are going from 50% to 65% garnishment leaving me with about 100.00 a week to live on. Can i apply for welfare or foodstamps or some kind of Gov't assistance to survive. Help!

I was a young mother due to failed birth control. I had to go on welfare for a short time because the father refused to support me and I could not afford daycare at the time. I never stopped the father from seeing his children. When I asked him to watch his kids if they were sick for an emergency he said he was not the babysitter. I was told I was to get 120 per child. I have only received maybe a years worth in 17 years. The father often told me how he was so screwed over by the state and he would never get a better job so it wouldn't be raised even though I told him if he paid I would stop having the state collect. I even did for three years because he told the children he paid so much I should be able to buy them expensive things. Now I am ill and on ssdi and really need the help. I reapplied and just like before just for the short time I was on it, welfare is taking all the child support I would get from years ago. I feel like that was to help us get on our feet and how can they take money from my children like this. We need this. They take their money first and if there is nothing left, and there never is. We get nothing. How does that help families?