Neanderthink: The Appeal of the Bad Boy

The Good, the Bad, and the Rest

Good guys are bewildered by the propensity of women to fall for the bad boys. And good women are indeed drawn to bad boys despite their emotional and sometimes physical unavailability. How, then, to make the mating game work with minimal pain?

• For Good Guys: Take heart; most women will want a good guy with good prospects (a stable job and lifestyle) eventually. Don't try to "act bad," since you'll come across as rude, a rube, or worse. Instead, work on being independent and assertive, and allowing spontaneity into your repartee. Discover your connection with someone in visceral, not just cerebral, ways.
• For Bad Boys: You don't need my advice—unless you want to have a great long-term relationship. Then you must learn to open up to the joys of committing—and they do exist.
• For women: Know what you really want, and accept the trade-off between your hot date and your simmering mate. Neither is right or wrong for you as long as you know what you're getting into. If you feel endangered or irritated by a man's compulsive and impulsive behaviors, get out immediately.