- Don't beat yourself up. Your desire is borne of your "mental architecture to acquire, acquire, acquire." So don't feel bad, but be alert to this tendency.
- Conjure up some shopper's skepticism by playing devil's advocate. Ask yourself, "What are the disadvantages of buying this?"
- Dig deeper and ask, "What is the real reason I want this?" If it's to lift a blue mood, know that the boost will be temporary. If it's to quell status anxiety, remember that keeping up with the Joneses is a losing battle.
How To Dematerialize
When Judith Levine, author of Not Buying It: My Year Without Shopping, renounced all but necessities for a year, she saved $8,000, had more time to spend with friends and do meaningful work, and felt liberated. But she also felt lonely and bored, because she couldn't go out to the movies, and lost, because her identity was shifting and her usual sources of stimulation were gone. It's not an easy road, but if you're ready to give things up (or at least cut back), here are a few practical steps to take:
Be more scholarly about stuff: Learning about the history and craftsmanship behind possessions can deepen your superficial interest and help you develop your own tastes, not those dictated by advertisers. Sotheby's, the famous auction house, runs a master's program that offers students a chance to choose one particular type of object and study it in depth. After a year or so in Jackson Hole, Frances hopes to enroll in the program to turn her obsession into expertise.
Get outside of yourself: If you can't stop thinking about those peep-toe sandals and how much you need them, distract yourself with a non-shopping-related activity, Levine says. Pick up a good book, take a bike ride, or meditate. Better yet, do something nice for a friend or neighbor. It'll fill up your soul without emptying your piggy bank.
Embrace your inner beatnik: "I reclaimed an old Bohemian identity that I'd always been comfortable with," says Levine. Once her life was structured around ideals such as living for art and fighting against conventionality, it was easier to avoid buying stuff. "I stopped thinking of myself as a consumer and started thinking of myself as a citizen."
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