I am an only child who was raised by a single parent. My parents divorced when I was 7. Soon thereafter, my dad remarried and decided he didn't want to see me anymore. I am now 27 and have been married a year and a half. My wife is one of four kids whose parents are still together. She wants to have kids in the next three years. We practice our religious beliefs, but I still have a problem with bringing a child into this sinful, dying world. Why don't I want to have kids?
Too bad dad couldn't manage remarriage and parenthood at the same time. Parental rejection is a terribly harsh experience and has colored your view of the world and childhood. But you are not predestined to repeat your father's mistakes. With awareness and intention—and the support and encouragement of your wife (something your father probably lacked)—you are free to become the parent you always wanted. That, in truth, is the only way to fully heal the deep wound you received. You'll discover that raising kids, while a huge responsibility, will also restore optimism. The love you invest will ultimately be repaid, with interest.
