My first assignment was the gratitude visit. It goes like this: Pick a person in your life whom you'd like to thank, someone who has meant a lot to you. Write this person a letter. After you've written it, call the person and ask to visit. Read the letter aloud when you are face to face.
Whom to thank? My mom, the ultimate role model? My first boss, who taught me the value of a to-do list? Reading aloud sounded a bit dramatic, probably involving a few tears and possibly a plane ride. The introverted Minnesotan in me began to panic.
I shared my fears with Martin Seligman, a professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania and the man who had in effect given me the assignment. "I think you may be a very good candidate for this," he murmured. His deep voice was sympathetic but firm. "I'm like you. And for those of us who are reserved and live in our heads and just do words, these are good exercises."
Tasks such as the gratitude visit were first introduced in Seligman's popular book Authentic Happiness, in which he outlines positive psychology, a movement he founded in the late 1990s.
Positive psychology focuses on cultivating personality strengths and honing an optimistic approach to life rather than on cataloging human frailty and disease, which Seligman says has too long been the focus of psychology. The movement has taken the field by storm, especially among young clinicians and students. But it has also attracted a growing number of critics.
If you want to learn to be a happier person, only a relatively small body of knowledge exists to help you, Seligman says. "After 60 years, clinical psychology can claim that it makes miserable people less miserable," he said at the second International Positive Psychology Summit in Washington, D.C. "But what about the person who wants to go from a plus three to a plus eight?"
Seligman has become positive psychology's street preacher, though he's long been recognized for other work in the field. In the 1970s he became known for his research in learned helplessness, the idea that continuous negative stimuli induce a permanent state of apathy and bring on depression. Later, he tackled the subject of learned optimism, a model for treating depression. He has written some 20 books, including The Optimistic Child and What You Can Change... and What You Can't. His latest undertaking is Authentic Happiness coaching, a spin-off from his book, which he teaches via telephone conference call to some 300 eager students in 24 weekly sessions. Despite the occasional clatter of typing or a barking dog in someone's living room, the teleconference has the atmosphere of an intimate seminar. Responses from students can sound at times like a virtual group hug. These "students" are in fact therapists, life coaches and psychiatrists who call in from 11 countries. Increasingly, CEOs, lawyers, human resource managers and schoolteachers are also paying the $2,000 fee. They are the first brigade in an army poised to disseminate positive psychology throughout their offices, clinics and schools. Seligman's dream is that in several years, 10,000 people will be certified Authentic Happiness coaches, ready to light the way for the rest of us to live joyous, meaningful lives.
But first the Authentic Happiness approach must be proven scientifically valid, a task Seligman and his research group are tackling online 24 hours a day. Anyone can take part in their online study, which randomly assigns exercises like the gratitude visit to users. (See authentichappiness.org.) Can the average person learn to be happier? I logged on to find out.
The first step in the Authentic Happiness regime is the Values in Action (VIA) survey, an online test of 240 questions that computes a person's five "signature" strengths, the basis for the rest of the course. Seligman and Chris Peterson, a psychologist at the University of Michigan who devised the strengths test, divide good personality traits into six categories, or virtues—wisdom and knowledge, transcendence, temperance, justice, love and courage. Each virtue contains between three and five strengths. The virtue of love, for example, is broken down into the three qualities of intimacy, kindness and social intelligence.
The VIA test is the most popular and useful part of Seligman's teachings according to participant surveys, even though most people aren't surprised by what the test tells them. "Love of learning" and "curiosity and interest in the world" are common strengths among reporters and writers, whereas photographers and artists seem to score highly in "appreciation of beauty." Philosophy majors may find "judgment, critical thinking and open-mindedness" at the top of their list. That friend who always says what is on her mind may find that "honesty, authenticity and genuineness" is her core strength. Three or four of the skills are usually traits familiar to people, says Seligman, but one or two may be unexpected.
Codifying one's strengths "gives people permission to know what they already know about themselves," says Betsy Rodriguez, a Bethel, Connecticut, family therapist-turned-life coach. "Sometimes when people are in jobs and are unhappy, they know it, but they're afraid to make the leap. If you took this test and found out that your career doesn't really match your strengths, you might think, 'Well, no wonder I've been miserable.'"
Tags:
1990s,
babies,
belief that,
clinical psychology,
clinicians,
exercises,
facets,
fait accompli,
Fears,
happiness,
marriage,
Martin Seligman,
optimism,
perfect in every way,
perfectman,
pessimism,
positive psychology,
pregnancy,
ready to have a baby,
relationship,
role model,
rush,
time at home,
unilateral approach,
university of pennsylvania,
washington d c,
wedded bliss,
wrong choice
