Just Do It?

This is for anyone who's been advised to "just do it" -- but can't.

You can't muster the energy or wherewithal to do what everyone -- and maybe even you -- knows will lift you out of depression. Then what do you do?

First, you should know that "just do it" is terrible advice. It's the kind of advice that makes it far less likely that you will take action of any kind. At the same time it betrays a gross misunderstanding on the part of the advice-giver of what goes wrong to create depression.

You can't "just do it." Still, there are some strategies you can take that will help you beat back the disorder.

* Stop the shame-blame game for yourself and others.

One effect of being told to "just do it" when you just can't is to feel deep shame for your inability to do what the rest of the world seems easily capable of doing. Expecting to act and finding yourself unable to do so is a big trigger for feelings of inadequacy. You blame yourself for your failing.

What you need to do instead is to decide to be your own coach while building energy step by step. You are in training for how to find and build energy. You will coach yourself at your own pace and over time build energy to begin to face the problems that caused your depression in the first place.

* Fight the belief that nothing can be done.

This step involves having an important fight with yourself and learning how to win. Disputation is a step you take in your own mind, combating the notion that your condition is hopeless.

It is the nature of the disorder to make you feel destitute and helpless. You may not yet personally subscribe to the idea that there is hope-in which case you will just have to accept it as a matter of trust. You must recognize that others -- many others -- have been where you are, and things have turned around for them. And they will for you too.

* Think of your energy level as a readout on an energy thermometer graded from 1 to 10 and gauge your energy level.

Zero represents no energy; 10 stands for being fully energized. It is not possible to take regular steps against depression unless you are in the 7-10 range. If your energy level is 0-3, then proceed with the following steps to build enough energy that you can begin to face the problems.

* Recognize that any constructive action is better than no action at all.

No step is too small to take. The smallest step could be the most productive. A small action respects the nature of the illness and how difficult it can be to take any action when we are significantly depressed.

The physics of depression decree that any action creates energy. Movement energizes; typically it gives you more energy than it takes, no matter how tired you are or how much you don't want to move.

Figure out the smallest step you can take. What qualifies is anything that you were not doing before. If you haven't talked to another person in a day, make a telephone call. If you haven't bathed because you don't care, take a shower. If you can't read because you can't concentrate, then turn on the television and watch something informative like a health show.

Action equals energy, and energy equals mastery. Micro-steps are the beginning of a journey. Like a toddler, you have to crawl before you can walk. And you have to get used to falling down and picking yourself up again. Eventually you will be able to take charge of your life again.

* As energy increases, take progressively bigger steps.

Develop goals and plans to meet them by outlining the steps that will get you from where you are to where you want to be. Don't go to the step until you have created more energy.

* Connect to others.

Connecting to other people always creates energy. The human spirit is energized from human connection. The connection can even be with a pet, another living being.

If after a week you are still unable to act, then seek an appointment with a physician. You will likely need an antidepressant to feed your brain the biological help it needs. Then when the antidepressant kicks in and helps restore energy, you can begin taking action steps.

* Do a relationship inventory to identify the energizers in your life.

Decide whether each person in your circle is an energy-giver or an energy-drainer. The energy-drainers are relentlessly negative. They do not understand depression. They tell you to pull yourself together or to snap out of it. They expect you to perform at previous levels of activity, which are impossible for you to achieve now.

For now, avoid them. Set up a protective mechanism so that you do not get near them. You need to protect yourself until you have developed or restored better coping mechanisms.

If you are at the beginning phase of creating energy and find it too difficult to take any steps at all, then go back and readjust your goals and expectations. They are just too big. Break them down into microgoals and eventually you will build more energy to take bigger steps that will eventually lead you out of your depression.