Wed to Weight

First comes love, then comes marriage, then… a pot belly? Women are vulnerable to putting on pounds after the wedding, says Edward Abramson, Ph.D., author of To Have and To Hold (Kensington, 1999). In one study, he notes, unhappily married women gained an average of 42 pounds in 13 years. The biggest problem is when weight becomes part of the marital dynamic. "A man often wants his wife to stay fat even as he tells her to lose weight," says the University of California at Chico psychology professor. "If she stays fat, it's OK for him to be fat," or keep up bad habits. For a woman to shed pounds successfully, she must take her weight out of the marriage. Realizing that her body is her concern is step one. If all else fails, she should see a therapist. "Even if her husband doesn't participate," says Abramson, "she will be more successful if she learns to separate relationship issues from eating."