Some marriages seem to collapse so suddenly that you'd need a crystal ball to predict their demise. In other cases, though, the seeds of marital dissolution are not only easier to see but they may be planted even before the honeymoon bills come due. According to UCLA psychologist Thomas Bradbury, Ph.D., the way a newlywed reacts when his or her spouse is facing a personal problem--work stress, say, or a recent weight gain--is a surprisingly good window into their marital future.
Bradbury and Lauri Pasch, Ph.D., invited 57 couples, all married less than six months, to discuss a difficulty that each partner was having. While some couples proved to be superstars at providing emotional support, others were woefully inept. "You just cringed when you watched them," Bradbury says.
Two years later, nine of the couples had already split and five other marriages were intact but hanging by a thread. These 14 couples, it turned out, had been far less likely to provide support to one another as newlyweds than the other 43 couples whose marriages were thriving. Bradbury thinks a couple's inability to help each other through tough times is what often blossoms into full-fledged marital discord--and ultimately divorce.
