"To be a model is an unconscious attempt at capturing that grand
feeling of being so special. It is a great draw for those models who
never had the experience. It is a process they can use, if they missed
the experience of mirroring or affirmation by an adoring parent, to
reenact what they missed."
An unrealistic fantasy pervades the modeling world. Many models
harbor a desperate wish for the photographer to single them out as
special, Diller and Muir-Sukenick observe. "They are subjected to a great
deal of rejection in the face of that fantasy. Or they get the
attention--until the next model comes along." While narcissism is a stage
of development and a difficulty at this stage can lead to narcissistic
vulnerability, narcissism may also be a defense, a way of compensating
for past painful experience--the loss of a significant person,
abandonment, or profound disappointment. The glory and glamour of
modeling, with grand promises of satisfaction, make it enticing.
The therapists found that models who entered modeling to support
their self-esteem, who lacked a cohesive self at the outset, could have a
great career--"because the modeling world supports that. The profession
provides an abundance of narcissistic rewards-glamour, money, attention,
all the earmarks of approval, for which a narcissistically vulnerable
person yearns.
Models have available to them many ways of masking their inner
anxiety or emptiness, say the two psychotherapists. They look at
themselves on the cover of a magazine and it builds them up. They have
people primping and grooming them. They look at themselves constantly in
the mirror, because it's okay in their world. For the moment they may
feel okay, but it's never long-lasting.
"Once they experience rejection, once they don't get the bookings
and the narcissistic highs of the profession are in short supply,
depression sets in, for which a secondary solution is sought through
drugs, alcohol, or pain-relieving substitutes."
There are, of course, some healthy models. Cindy Crawford appears
to be one of them. And a rare few even become healthy along the way. Who
are they? They're the ones who can distinguish between the external
rewards or disappointments the modeling role brings them, and the
internal components of their self-worth. They enjoy the external rewards
of modeling--the money, the glamour, the visibility--but don't confuse
them with their self-worth. But if her sense of self-worth is always
dependent on the photographer, the agent, Mademoiselle, or whatever, life
is going to feel constantly rocky.
"Modeling's a very nebulous thing," says Muir-Sukenick. "How can it
define you? You were photographed, put in a magazine. It doesn't look
like you. It doesn't feel like you. What is it, exactly? And models are
at a point in their lives when they are trying to define
themselves."
THE YOUNG AND THE STRANGE
One of the most unmistakable features of models is their youth. And
while that may be good for the film, it's less wonderful for the model's
development. "For many," says Diller, "modeling is offered at a time in
their lives when they are trying to negotiate the big adolescent/adult
issues--what is the meaning of life, what do I want to do with my life,
how do I separate from my family. If they go into modeling, they skip
over actually having to resolve them; they are swept up into an unreal
world that temporarily solves some of these issues." When the bookings
stop, they're stuck with the issues they never dealt with.
"Though we project onto them all kinds of maturity and womanliness,
and they are often depicted so in images, they really do suffer in many
ways from arrested development," says Muir-Sukenick. Of the models they
interviewed who eventually landed okay, or who are working as older
models, adds Diller, "many of them commented about their young lives: 'I
didn't know what I was doing. It's amazing I got through that.'"
It is one of the ironies of modeling that many of the women who do
it well are not beautiful; they are photogenic. "They're typically very
tall, gawky, strange-looking young girls, who do not experience
themselves as beautiful," says Muir-Sukenick.
"So while the camera transforms them, they never feel transformed.
The camera is helping to fool the viewer, but the model is never
convinced. Dayle Haddon, who has felt more beautiful as she aged, told us
that for the longest time she couldn't understand why people were oohing
and ahhing, because that was not her experience of herself. There are
models who are the exception, who feel beautiful, and models who project
beauty without realizing it--and the viewer doesn't know the
difference."
Adds Diller: "One patient of mine, a model who was in fact not that
beautiful but was a perfect body and face for people to do things to,
felt that it was all a dream she was walking through. She couldn't
understand the money or the attention, so the money got frittered away.
She didn't know what to do with the men who clamored over her. Discovered
in her sophomore year of high school, she had dropped out without
graduating. When the dream ended, she was in debt with no resources to
turn to."
THE BIG BAD IMAGE BIZ
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