Discusses the characteristic of perceived fraudulence, or
self-doubt. Studies by Yale University psychologist John Kolligian Jr.;
Why self-doubters suffer anxiety, depression or embarrassment; How they
can be helped.
By
PT Staff, published on March 01, 1994
SELF-DOUBT
Feeling anxious about the way others perceive you is normal. But
what if you can't shake the belief that the person you appear to be
differs from the person you really are?
About a third of Americans feel like frauds at some point and are
convinced that their "fake fronts" have misled others. As a result, they
suffer from anxiety, depression, or embarrassment.
Often, they're the ones who seem most successful--the sharpest
students, the best parents, the most effective employees, says John
Kolligian, Jr., Ph.D. "You think when a person goes up the ladder, they
somehow become more self-assured. But it's precisely the opposite" says
Kolligian, a Yale University psychologist who's studied perceived
fraudulence for years.
Unable to overcome their intense self-criticism, impostors
attribute their success to external events--"I got the promotion because
my boss has low standards"--instead of taking credit for their own
talents.
Frauds are also very careful monitors of the impressions they give
off and cues they pick up from others. Starting new jobs, new
relationships, and new schools is all the more threatening as impostors
sense the high expectations of those around them and know that if they
let down their "shell," they may fail--or even worse, succeed.
Success is only one of their fears. Frauds may also worry that
friends will scorn or abandon them if they find out what they're truly
like.
For this reason, new beginnings can actually be helpful, opening
opportunities for change, provoking impostors to reassess who they are
and who they want to be. "Ultimately the motivation to change comes from
a sense of dissatisfaction"--and from a lot of soul-searching, says
Kolligian.
Admitting to feeling fraudulent is a big step, as impostors are
often "very, very embarrassed" about revealing their true selves.
Sometimes the admission ushers in self-comfort. But for others,
reevaluating their self-image is a life-long task.
PHOTO: Woman looking at a distorted picture of herself.
Tags:
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belief that,
cues,
dissatisfaction,
Fears,
fraud,
frauds,
high expectations,
impressions,
insecurity,
ladder,
new beginnings,
new jobs,
self criticism,
self doubt,
self-criticism,
self-image,
soul searching,
success,
true selves,
university psychologist,
yale university
