MWE: If we develop a very high-quality early-childhood system
building on Head Start, down the road we can integrate it with a range of
child-care subsidies-the child-care block grant, Family Support Act child
care, state preschool money-so that you eventually have an integrated
system that serves all parents and all children. You have got to make
sure that good public policy does what parents want it to do.
Parents need a genuine choice whether to stay at home and take care
of their children, adequate child support so that parents take
responsibility for supporting their kids, adequate jobs that pay well so
people can care for their kids, and good child care in case the parents
want to go to work. Parenting is important and work is important and
support for children is important.
But at the outset I'm taking care of those children who most need
it.
The black community bears the burden of having to instigate social
change. So we're trying to reestablish the intergenerational
connectedness that I certainly had growing up. We are training a new
generation of young people. Black college students across the country
have set up the Ella Baker Leadership Training institute and a network
among themselves. What little black boys and girls need is not people
like me coming in and saying, "You know, you can be this," but seeing
kids closer to their own ages to get a sense of the possibilities. We
skipped over a generation, but it's being reborn.
PHOTO: Marian Wright Edelman with a young child (JONATHAN
LEVINE)
PHOTOS (4) Marian Wright Edelman (JOE PINEIRO(
PHOTO: Marian Wright Edelman with her husband, Peter, and sons
Joshua, Jonah, and Ezra
DEAR JOSHUA:
On the occasion of her eldest son's 21st birthday, Marian Wright
Edelman sat down and drafted a letter to pass on what she had learned
about the lessons of life. The letter grew into a book that has become a
best-seller, The Measure of Our Success: A Letter to My Children and
Yours (Beacon Press; Boston). At the heart of the book are 25 lessons in
which Edelman exhorts us all to make no distinction between private and
public values. Here's a sampling of her wisdom.
There is no free lunch. Don't feel entitled to anything you don't
sweat and struggle for. You have got to work your way up-hard and
continuously. Each of us must take the initiative to create our
opportunities, not wait around for favors. We must not assume a door is
closed but must push on it. We must not assume if it was closed yesterday
that it's closed today.
Assign yourself. My Daddy used to ask us whether the teacher had
given us any homework. If we said no, he'd say, "Well, assign yourself."
Don't wait around for your boss or your co-worker or spouse to direct you
to do what you are able to figure out and do for yourself. Don't do just
as little as you can to get by. If someone asks you to do A, and B and C
obviously need to be done as well, do them without waiting to be asked or
expecting a Nobel prize for doing what is needed.
Take parenting and family life seriously and insist that those you
work for and who represent you do. Since too many men in power still just
don't get how hard it is to juggle work and family burdens, it is time
for the struggling, beleaguered mothers-and supportive fathers-of this
nation to tell our leaders to get with it and stop the political
hypocrisy so that all parents can have a real choice about whether to
remain at home or work outside the home without worrying about the well
being of their children.
Remember that your wife is not your mother or your maid, but your
partner and friend. Young men need to take the responsibility for seeing
and figuring out what needs to be done at home just as you do at your
job. There is nothing that decrees that only women are capable of
cleaning toilets, washing clothes, cleaning up children's vomit,
remembering flowers, staying at home from work or having the
responsibility for asking you to stay home, any more than it is a given
that only you are responsible for meeting all family expenses or for
cleaning out the garage.
Sell the shadow for the substance. Don't confuse style with
substance; don't confuse political charm or rhetoric with decency or
sound policy. Words and schmoozing alone do not meet children's or the
nation's needs. Political leadership and different budget priorities do.
There's nothing wrong with wanting a BMW or nice clothes. But a BMW is
not an advanced degree and a designer coat is not a life goal or worth a
life. Get your insides in order and your direction clear first, then
worry about clothes and wheels. You may need them less.
Be confident that you can make a difference. My role model,
Sojourner Truth, slave woman, could neither read nor write but could not
stand slavery and second-class treatment of women. One day during an
anti-slavery speech she was heckled by an old man. "Old woman, do you
think that your talk about slavery does any good? Why I don't care any
more for your talk than I do for the bite of a flea." "Perhaps not, but
the Lord willing, I'll keep you scratching," she replied.
A lot of people think they have to be big dogs to make a
difference. That's not true. You just need to be a flea for justice bent
on building a more decent home life, neighborhood, work place, and
America. Enough committed fleas biting strategically can make even the
biggest dog uncomfortable and transform even the biggest nation.
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