A few years after miraculously surviving stage 4 non-Hodgkins lymphoma, I felt a strong desire to give back to others like many grateful cancer survivors do. I decided to begin working with couples and families dealing with cancer. Read More
David Goldman went through every parent's worst nightmare in 2004, when his four-year-old son Sean was abducted. Making matters worse, it was Goldman's wife who took the boy to her hometown in Brazil and then informed Goldman she wanted a divorce. Read More
Imagine a world in which people interacted with each other like ants or fish. Imagine a day at work like this, or in your family, aware of the surface behavior of the people around you but oblivious to their inner life while they remain unmoved by your own.
That's a world without empathy. To me, it sounds like a horror film. Read More
Dogs are what we secretly are or wish we could be. We understand our dogs and we identify with them. I lovelovelovelovelove you: now prove it by rubbing my belly for two hours. Our reward is the hormone suffusion born of such intimate entitlement and desire, the companionship of sentience. Push a dog away and our hearts are pushed away. Read More
I admit, I'm biased. I already believe that our modern diets are nutrient-deficient and that these deficiencies affect the way our brain works. Over the past year I've collected a good deal of evidence to suggest my supposition is correct, but I'm still open to being proven wrong. Read More
I miss Iris Chang. When she committed suicide in November, 2004, I felt like I'd lost a sister, and the world had lost an important leader. Now, we all have the opportunity to know Iris through the eyes of her mother and best friend, Ying-Ying Chang, in an outstanding memoir. Read More
In my last post I advocated that we move beyond resiliency as a goal to thriving as a goal. Why settle for less? But what does thriving look like? I feel like I am thriving in my life right now (it has not always been the case). So here is my own personal take on what contributes to thriving. Virtually all are proven practices that facilitate mental and physical health. Read More
"Is there a guidebook for making it as a Global Cosmopolitan couple?" In a recent presentation to an MBA alumni meeting in France, one experienced Global Cosmopolitan currently living in France raised this key question that the rest of audience echoed. Read More
Sometimes women don’t know that they can ask for something. Not socialized in the male competitive ways, many women don’t realize that it’s okay to ask for more pay or an extra vacation day. And when they do, they often ask for less and accept less in their bargaining. Read More
Although Anthony Weiner -- and before him Bill Clinton -- seriously endangered their careers through their sexual misconduct, their behavior still falls short of the compulsivity and wanton self-destructiveness that define addiction. Instead, their purposes in life protected them from addiction -- which is the main issue facing Weiner in therapy. Read More
Imagine that you are a woman, sitting alone in a bar. A young attractive man at a table next to you is joking with his friends and making them laugh. After a few minutes his friends leave and he approaches you, asking for your telephone number so he can take you on a date at a later time. Would you be persuaded by him? Read More
I know what it’s like to be the only Y chromosome in the room, swimming in a sea of estrogen.
I didn’t start out in life to be a stay-at-home dad. I didn’t fantasize that I’d spend years laboring over my PhD, and get licensed as a psychologist to stay home kissing my wife at the door on her way to the car, saying, “Have a nice day dear.”
It just kind of happened.
Many therapists have a no phone rule, but I've decided to roll with it. If a client keeps the phone on and feels the urgency to send and receive texts immediately, we'll experience and deal with it together in session. Read More
When our loved one erupts in anger and frustration, the last thing most of us think to do is to pour fuel on the fire by telling them they should feel angry and frustrated. Yet when done correctly, providing someone emotional validation can have extremely surprising results. Read More