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No One Has to Be Alone

Navigating the challenging transitions of illness, death, and bereavement

Grief
Grief is Like a Fingerprint.

Lani Leary Ph.D. on August 22, 2013

Our grief is unique, like a fingerprint. But we all know loss. We must do our own grief work, but benefit from the support and validation that comes from belonging to a community that acknowledges the death, honors the deceased and the relationship with the bereaved.

Our grief is unique, like a fingerprint. But we all know loss. We must do our own grief work, but benefit from the support and validation that comes from belonging to a community that acknowledges the death, honors the deceased and the relationship with the bereaved.

Relationships
There Is No End to Hope

Lani Leary Ph.D. on July 19, 2013

Giving up treatment does not mean we are abandoning hope. We can redefine and reframe hope for realistic, meaningful interventions and ways of being that can provide intimacy and authenticity at the end of life.

Giving up treatment does not mean we are abandoning hope. We can redefine and reframe hope for realistic, meaningful interventions and ways of being that can provide intimacy and authenticity at the end of life.

Philosophy
We Can Help the Dying to Feel Held

Lani Leary Ph.D. on April 11, 2013

Hospice care offers hope, reduces fears, and supports people to live right up to their last breath. We can be prepared and design our "best death" based on our values and wishes. With the hospice philosophy and team, no one has to die alone, and no one has to grieve alone.

Hospice care offers hope, reduces fears, and supports people to live right up to their last breath. We can be prepared and design our "best death" based on our values and wishes. With the hospice philosophy and team, no one has to die alone, and no one has to grieve alone.

Attention
Listening Is a Ministry and Discipline

Lani Leary Ph.D. on April 3, 2013

To listen to another asks that we create a safe place; hold their truth; and behold their highest nature.

To listen to another asks that we create a safe place; hold their truth; and behold their highest nature.

Grief
We Can Discover As Well As Recover From Grief

Lani Leary Ph.D. on November 3, 2012

Grief is information and we must bring it out into the light in order to discover how to soften our despair.

Grief is information and we must bring it out into the light in order to discover how to soften our despair.

Grief
The Power of Permission

Lani Leary Ph.D. on June 2, 2012

When was the last time you asked a patient's permission to touch, talk, or enter their room?

When was the last time you asked a patient's permission to touch, talk, or enter their room?

Grief
The Double-Bind of Masculine Grief

Lani Leary Ph.D. on May 23, 2012

Men often report feeling in a “double bind” in which they are expected to “act like a man”, but judged for not sharing “like a woman”. Men feel their grief, but are more likely to manage it through activities and time alone to cognitively, rather than emotionally, process their understanding of the death.

Men often report feeling in a “double bind” in which they are expected to “act like a man”, but judged for not sharing “like a woman”. Men feel their grief, but are more likely to manage it through activities and time alone to cognitively, rather than emotionally, process their understanding of the death.

Grief
No One Has to Grieve Alone

Lani Leary Ph.D. on April 24, 2012

Grief does not end, but grief can be transformed. Grief can soften. We can learn to accept our grief.

Grief does not end, but grief can be transformed. Grief can soften. We can learn to accept our grief.

Fear
No One Has to Die Alone

Lani Leary Ph.D. on April 12, 2012

In the 25 years I have worked as a psychotherapist and hospice worker, I have had the privilege of being at the bedside of more than 500 people as they died. They taught me that how they die matters. They taught me the attitudes, skills, and competencies so that I could be of service and make a difference. You can too.

In the 25 years I have worked as a psychotherapist and hospice worker, I have had the privilege of being at the bedside of more than 500 people as they died. They taught me that how they die matters. They taught me the attitudes, skills, and competencies so that I could be of service and make a difference. You can too.